I recently gave a lecture to a group of high school parents about using social media. Instead of focusing on their children, I first asked the parents about their own use of social media sites like Instagram and Facebook. As a consultant, I believe that considering this experience could help other practitioners when working with adolescent clients or their parents. At the beginning of our discussion, I asked the following questions:

How many of you use social media?
How many of you have considered changing your social media usage habits?
What is stopping you from making these changes?
How often do you feel pressured to post, like, or comment on other people's posts?
How many of you have had similar conversations with your children?

This was one of the most insightful discussions about social media use I've ever had with parents. I assumed that parents would regularly think about their own use of social media and talk to their children about navigating the digital world. All parents present indicated that they participated in social media sites. They had all considered leaving or changing the way they use social media, but maintaining their connections for a variety of reasons, including: B. to stay in touch with family and friends. use the marketplace; Monitoring the use of children; Getting messages; or learn about community events. In addition, almost all parents felt pressured to participate in an online social media platform to maintain relationships, support someone in their social environment, or avoid cumbersome interactions. However, none of them had considered talking to their children about using social media. Why is that?

Many adults and parents assume that tweens and teens know more about social media than we do. And that may be true. At the same time, adults can help children process their experiences in these environments. Younger people may know how to post stories, use filters, and increase the number of followers than their parents, teachers, trainers, or advisors. However, this does not make them experts in social media. Young people need help tapping into unknown areas that create these online environments. Most counselors and parents are aware of the security concerns associated with online activity, but there are other important issues to consider, such as:

Tell me more about the social media platforms and apps you use. How do you work? What do you like about them?
What are your interactions Are they positive or do you sometimes get into negativity or conflict?
What kind of pressure do you feel ready for yourself? What types of pressure are you unsure of how to deal with?
How do you filter who you allow on your social media and who you deny access to?
How many followers or likes do you like best? What would it mean to you to reach that number?
What will you do if someone you know from school or work sends a request to a friend or followers but you question their intentions? How would you feel if you blocked or unfriended someone?
How would you react if you discovered something inappropriate or unfriendly on one of the publicly accessible platforms such as Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter or Facebook? Would your reaction change if you knew your reaction could reappear in the future or in another app?

It can be a lot of work to keep up with the way technology is changing our relationships and our world, but we can't afford to take our hands off the wheel. Although not all consultants choose to participate in social media websites like Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp or Snapchat, it is important to always be up to date with how these social media platforms affect life and relationships of the customer impact. For those who work with customers of children and adolescents, it is equally important to find reputable resources that they can share with the customer's caregivers. Websites like commonsense.org can be helpful as a starting point. Local libraries and schools often hold workshops or meetings that also deal with navigating through digital spaces.

Just as we cannot expect parents to navigate the digital world without guidance, we cannot expect young people to understand all the social nuances of the online social world without our help. By working with young people and allowing ourselves to find weaknesses in our lack of expertise, we may be able to help them think about some big questions about who they are, what they represent, and how they want to show themselves in the world – not only online but IRL (in real life).

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Further reading from the archive of Counseling Today: "#disconnected: Why consultants can no longer ignore social media"

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Adria S. Dunbar is an assistant professor in the Department of Education, Politics and Human Development at North Carolina State University in Raleigh. She has more than 15 years of experience with efficient and inefficient technology in the areas of school, private practice and consultant training. Contact them at [email protected].

@ TechCounselor's Instagram is @ TechCounselor.

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The opinions and comments expressed in articles from CT Online do not reflect the opinions of the editors or guidelines of the American Counseling Association.

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