"As you get older you will find that you have two hands, one to help yourself and the other to help others." – Maya Angelou
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Sue Pressman, 69th President of ACA
H appy Holidays! It is hard to believe that we will reach the end of 2020. It's been quite a roller coaster ride this year, with emotions and events that got us to peaks and dives, complete with loops and turns, hand grip moments and also some relief.
As consultants, we often go roller coaster with those we serve. Because we understand the importance of work-life balance, many of us have conversations with our clients about the importance of personal values, lifestyle management and self-care. Given the plight associated with the coronavirus pandemic and the life changes it brings, self-sufficiency can be an impossible task for many, one that further affects their emotional and physical wellbeing.
As a consultant it is sometimes difficult to remember to be good to ourselves. So I'd like to focus this column on the importance of taking care of yourself, especially during the holidays, both happy and difficult times.
The Global Wellness Institute defines wellness as "the active pursuit of activities, choices and lifestyles that lead to a state of holistic health". Each of us is unique in how we take care of ourselves in different ways. The need for self-care is documented in books, research, and even in an ACA task force that focuses on the importance of wellness and self-care by counselors. Emotional, social, spiritual, intellectual, and physical wellbeing are essential, and as counselors, it is our ethical responsibility to practice self-care and wellbeing for ourselves in order to best support those we serve.
As we go through 2021, it has never been more important that we practice what we teach and advocate as advisors. To be our “healthiest selves” by participating in daily exercises and integrating wellness strategies into our lifestyle is of paramount importance. My grown daughter, who is a certified yoga teacher, often reminds me of the importance of living with a conscience. Sometimes it can be healing and nurturing to do something as simple as walking outside, making contact with an old friend, or listening to your favorite music.
The National Institutes of Health (NIH) offers five wellness toolkits that you can use to practice a healthy lifestyle. These toolkits (see nih.gov/health-information/your-healthiest-self-wellness-toolkits) deal with how we make our environment safer, how we deal with the pressures of life, how we increase our physical well-being and how we are positive social networks create habits and how we can protect our health.
From NIH, here are six strategies for improving your emotional health.
1) Brighten your point of view: manage negative emotions and hold onto positive emotions.
Remember good deeds.
Forgive yourself.
Spend more time with friends.
Explore your beliefs about the meaning of life.
Develop healthy physical habits.
2) Reduce stress: Learning healthy methods for dealing with chronic stress can increase resilience.
Sleep enough.
Exercising regularly: 30 minutes a day can make a big difference.
Establish a support network.
Set priorities.
Think positively.
Try relaxation methods.
Ask for help.
3) Get a good night's sleep: Sleep influences both our mental and physical well-being. It's important that your body get the rest of it it needs to be the best version of itself.
Go to bed and get up at the same time every night.
Limit the use of electronic devices before bed.
Before bed, relax by meditating, reading, or listening to soothing music.
4) Coping with loss: Learn healthy ways to help yourself in difficult times.
Talk to caring friends.
Find a mourning group.
Talk to your doctor.
Consider additional assistance.
Be patient. Grief takes time. Grief can be a roller coaster ride of emotions.
5) Strengthening social connections: Our relationships can have a positive effect on our health.
Join a group that is dedicated to your favorite hobbies such as hiking, painting or quilting.
Volunteer for things that are important to you.
6) Be careful.
Take a deep breath. Inhale through your nose to four, hold for a second, then exhale through your mouth to five. Repeat often.
Enjoy a walk.
Practice mindful eating.
Find mindfulness activities or resources like yoga and apps.
If you're looking for a good book to start the holiday season, get a copy of Counselor Self-Care (2018) by Gerald Corey, Michelle Muratori, Jude T. Austin II, and Julius A. Austin (published by ACA) . I especially loved Chapter Two, which discusses the seasons of a career and has some wonderful stories to tell. It was introduced earlier this year as part of the ACA package of 15 free training products.
I look forward to ringing the doorbell in 2021 with the hope of well-being, peace and a year of new beginnings!
