"The price of everything is the amount of life you trade in for it." ~ Henry David Thoreau
We all do business in life.
We exchange our time. We act with our energy. We trade with our hard-earned money. We exchange our attention.
Many of us move through life in constant motion and never stop thinking about where this movement is leading us. If it helps or hinders us. When the trades we do every day make us live our best lives. When the trades give us more time with those we care most about. If we can appear fully committed, energetic and enthusiastic for them.
Or do we show up tired, distracted and frustrated for them?
The trades we make in life take a toll on us physically, mentally and emotionally.
Exchange my time, energy and enthusiasm for status and a corner office
Like many of us, I've spent part of my life chasing the corporate dream. You know the stuff – more money, more responsibility, catchy job title, more praise.
But something interesting happened on the way. With every new raise, someone always earned more. Any change in the job title was quickly stale. More responsibility was often associated with a lot more headaches and often more politics (something that I have a low tolerance for). Progress never really felt long after progress. I always felt like I was bumping into a glass ceiling.
I noticed these feelings and wanted to understand them, so some personal considerations and self-observation followed. I realized I felt that way because I was chasing things that I thought I should be chasing instead of things that I really wanted to chase. A simple but strong distinction.
The grind, the hustle and bustle and the networking of your way up is a well-established way, but also the way of another. It never really suited me and the deeper I wanted to embed myself in a corporate machine, the more I realized that I was looking for something else. I needed something more than that. This model would always suit me badly.
So this is the part where I tell you that I decided to pursue my dreams and live from my “passion project”. Well, not exactly.
I decide to found myself as a company. I would not have to wait years for a “directorate”. I was now director of my own ship. Fortunately, I have skills and experiences that others consider valuable and have been able to earn a living since (almost ten years as I write this).
This time it wasn't just champagne and roses. I've had some very sterile times when I thought I might need a new plan. To counteract this, I also had very rich periods full of rewarding work, clients, and healthy paychecks.
Is this my job a dream job? No. There are other potentially more entertaining ways to earn a living (e.g. writing full time). And knowing that you have to find your own job focuses the mind and involves a certain amount of risk. So it's definitely not for everyone. You also need thick skin for this work.
However, my work gives me a degree of freedom and flexibility that I really appreciate (for example that I can take off and travel for a long time). Within reason, I can decide which work to say yes to. I also rarely have to be in the office to show my face and set a clock every day. I can work from home, in a cafe, or anywhere else. My performance is measured, not how often people see me in the office.
These aspects (freedom and flexibility) are particularly important to me. More than job titles and corner offices.
My work offers me an intellectual challenge that I appreciate. And sometimes I work with some very cool people, I learn a lot, and I make significant changes.
There can sometimes be gaps between clients and projects, but when I'm engaged, I make good money (by most standards). It pays off for adventure and travel, is enough for me and at the same time a fair price for the people I work with.
To be clear, there is nothing wrong with working for others. Regardless of whether you work directly for a business unit (employee) or are self-employed (like me), we all serve someone. We are not all entrepreneurs or self-employed and that is fine. Find your own fit and accept it, I say. There are many ways for us to make a living.
My point is that I am aware of my trades and mostly like to do them. If that changes, I have to make a new plan.
Broader Lessons
While my example is to become a company to support the way I want to live my life, this can be the opposite of where you are and what you need.
Your professions may be geared towards finding a job that gives you a paycheck and a pension, and someone else to find the job. That's okay, your trades must be trades that you are willing to do.
I advocate that we are aware of the trades we make in life. That we are aware of where we spend our energy, time and effort. Essentially aware of where we pretend to be.
This is a powerful prism through which we can objectively view everything we do.
Yes, sometimes we have to make trades that may not be our first choice, but we can do this on purpose. Realizing that there is a larger good or longer term goal in the game.
We can also see that we make trades that we would rather not make, trades that take more from us than they give back, and we can then act accordingly.
Questions we can ask ourselves
We can keep the trades we make in the foreground by asking ourselves some simple but searching questions.
Are the trades we make worth the energy / time / effort / money we spend on them? Are we likely to see a return on our investment?
Do the trades we make help us get closer to our goals?
Are the trades we make beneficial to our relationships? Are we present and available to the people we care most about?
Do the trades we make have energy?
Do the businesses we do comply with our moral code?
Do the trades we make give us the best chance of leading a good life?
If not, maybe we should do different trades.
Be aware of where you do business in your life. Make them selective. Give them your full attention and treat them with the care they deserve.
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