"What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny things compared to what lies within us."
– Henry Stanley Haskins
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[ NOTE: This is this third track in a COVID-19 recovery series. See the first and second installments.]
The sun shining in my window wakes me up before my alarm clock goes off and I roll out of bed. After navigating around Elsa, my 3 year old poodle who is now spread out on either side of the bed (neither labeled as hers), I make it to my dresser and pull out my workout clothes. I am a creature of habit and my exercise program is consistent. At the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, I built a home gym and took Zoom and YouTube courses. Body Pump on Mondays and Fridays. Step Wednesdays and Saturdays. Yoga in between. The only class I didn't do from home was biking, which was replaced by biking outdoors when the weather was fine. It wasn't perfect, but it kept my body moving and my mind clear. After the two-week waiting period recommended by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) after my last COVID-19 vaccination, I resumed my gym training, now masked and physically distant.
That was up to this week. I walked into the gym, stole my membership tag, and grabbed a towel. I did notice, however, that people behind the desk were smiling. SMILING! I realized that nobody (except me) was wearing a mask. I looked up, embarrassed, and asked, "Are we ready to take the mask off?" The smile and nod went on. The latest recommendations from the CDC suggest that fully vaccinated people without masks can meet both indoors and outdoors. In twenty-four hours, my gym responded by lifting all capacity and mask restrictions. I took off my mask and went to my class where the Xs stuck on the floor had already been removed to encourage physical distancing. I set up my gear in my usual location and waited while others came into class, each with a smile – and a reservation. “I feel naughty if I don't wear my mask,” said one person. "Is it weird that I still feel like I have to stand 6 feet from you?" another asked. Even the trainer was a bit disoriented towards the new assignment. I watched everyone master the change – such an abrupt turnaround after a year of fear of masking, dissociating and washing ourselves to protect ourselves from a virus that has changed our lives as we knew it.
Trauma-informed re-entry
The past year was marked by unprecedented circumstances. We have overcome lockdowns, a lack of toilet paper, remote work and a virtual school. We have experienced losses – separation from family and friends, complete interruption of the routine and the loss of loved ones (see “Counseling Connoisseur: Navigating the loss of COVID-19”). Holidays and vacations have been replaced by Zoom meetings and stays. The politicization of the pandemic increased confusion and fear.
With the lifting of the restrictions on the distribution of the vaccine, there seemed to be a certain grace period (see “Counseling Connoisseur: Hope in action and mental health”). However, we are far from being "back to normal". The vaccination distribution continues with simultaneous cross-party banter. The mask requirement has been relaxed and we feel both relieved and vulnerable. School and work return to the stationary room, but with jubilation but also with reluctance. If we return to some semblance of pre-COVID-19 life and routines, we are left with the aftermath of the chaos not only of the pandemic, but also of the heated battle against racial injustice and the violent uprising on January 6th.
As trauma therapists, we know that we cannot be expected to resume activities at full capacity prior to COVID-19. It will take time and work to re-integrate with the surge in sensory demand, scheduling capacity, and social engagement. We can help our clients and each other to understand the changes and support trauma-informed re-entry. Here are a few tips:
Prepare for sensory demands: I was amazed at how daunting even driving on a freeway seemed after a year of commuting to my makeshift office and an occasional trip to the park . I was basically staying within a mile of: grocery store, gas station, home. Now I crossed several lanes at high speed and learned to read traffic signs on the way again. Allow time and space to get used to the sensory demands again.
Pace Plan Capacity : A common topic of conversation lately has been how the pandemic allowed us to rethink our schedules. The board meetings, book clubs and sporting events were restricted. Optional activities have been removed from our often overbooked planners. Many people have commented on how the pandemic increased the importance of downtime, which allowed people to spend time with their household members, take leisurely hikes in nature, or just start over at home. With the excitement of returning to work, comes the anticipation of returning to cluttered schedules. Now is the time to reconsider those commitments. Set limits. Say no and give someone else the opportunity to bake this cake or lead this community project. It's okay to step back or choose not to re-enter the hustle and bustle.
Plan for social reintegration: This is what I am writing on my first plane flight in a year and a half. I go to my daughter, my son-in-law and my grandson. Fully vaccinated (but still masked for travel), I can't wait to hug my kids and just be with them. However, I do know that there will be temporary inconvenience as we remove our masks and get involved again. Oh, it'll only be for a nanosecond, then I'll kiss their whole faces – but that nanosecond is real! Aside from virtual get-togethers and gatherings with our little family and friends, most of us haven't had a real smile or a real hug in over a year. It can take time to adapt to social engagement. When you return to work and meet clients or colleagues, take the time to just reconnect. Smile, greetings, small talk. Allow masks to be worn if you and others feel the need (or are still required). The art of connection is the counselor's guardianship. But we too may need to allow extra time to warm up when we resume face-to-face sessions. Consider continuing to offer telemedicine / virtual meetings as you can facilitate a safe return.
It was a challenging time. As we move towards healing, we are not there yet. There is so much more to realize and prepare for as we return to our work, school, and social lives. We are resilient and as counselors we can help our families, friends, and clients better acclimate themselves in a trauma-informed manner by helping them prepare for sensory demands, align scheduling capacities, and plan social reintegration.
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Cheryl Fisher
Cheryl Fisher is a licensed clinical counselor in private practice in Annapolis, Maryland. She is the director and assistant professor for the online MA in Clinical Counseling at Alliant International University California School of Professional Psychology. Her research interests include the study of sexuality and spirituality in young women with advanced breast cancer; nature-informed therapy; and geek therapy. She can be contacted at [email protected].
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